And the multitude of them that
believed were of one heart and of one soul: neither said any of them that ought
of the things which he possessed was his own; but they had all things in common.
And with great power gave the apostles witness of the resurrection of the Lord
Jesus: and great grace was upon them all. Neither was there any among them that
lacked: for as many as were possessors of lands or houses sold them, and
brought the prices of the things that were sold, and laid them down at the
apostles' feet: and distribution was made unto every man according as he had
need -
Acts 4:32-35.
If there be, therefore, any
consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit,
if any bowels and mercies, fulfill ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the
same love, being of one accord, of one mind. Let nothing be done through strife
or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than
themselves. Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the
things of others. Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus
- Philippians 2:1-5.
Cultivate the understanding that the self is not really
an independently existing entity, and begin to view self instead in terms of its
dependent relation to others. Although, it is difficult to say that merely
reflecting on this will produce a profound spiritual realization, it will at
least have some effect. Your mind will be more open. Something will begin to
change within you. Therefore, even in the immediate term there is definitely a
positive and beneficial effect in reversing these two attitudes and moving from
self-centeredness to other-centeredness, from belief in self-existence to
belief in dependent origination - Dalai Lama XIV.
The spirit that should prevail amongst Christians is the
spirit of Community, not an individualist spirit. Jesus died to make us a
kingdom of priests (Revelation 1:6a), not islands. Beneath the Cross every
ground is level – Hilary
Johnson Chukwuma Chukwurah.
An orchestra was playing for a group of wealthy
guests. When they concluded a particular performance, the conductor who
obviously was carried away by the group’s wonderful performance announced, “Now, I shall perform for you …!” No
instrument responded to his command. He repeated his announcement using the
first person singular. Again, nothing happened. A voice spoke from behind him, “Do not say, ‘I’; say We!” He immediately corrected himself and
announced, “Now, we shall perform for you
…!” The instruments came alive and delivered a most commanding performance.
Without controversy, we live in a Me, Myself and I
generation; a generation where self
is the epicenter. The end-time spirit of I
is the spirit of negative self-love (II Timothy 3:1-5). It is characterized by
“Me first” mentality and reinforced by self-importance where self is past, present and future. In
this era, ego is celebrated.
I would like to commence my presentation by highlighting
Biblical characters who demonstrated Me,
Myself and I mentalities and those who repudiated them in what I call the
Negatives
and the
Positives:
THE NEGATIVES
In Scripture, several characters displayed the Me, Myself and I mentalities
at various points in their lives. Amongst these were:
King Hezekiah
After King Hezekiah was healed of his sickness and had
his life extended by almost twenty year, he blew the fuse. God was angry with
him for showing Babylonian emissaries the secret treasures of his kingdom. In
displaying His displeasure, God told him that he had jeopardized the interests
of Israel and then gave him two options: to
accept calamity in his days or have it occur in the days of his posterity. Selfishly, King Hezekiah chose the
second option. He sealed the future of his children and that of the nation of
Israel when he said to Prophet Isaiah,
“…Good is the word of the LORD which
thou hast spoken. And he said, Is it not
good, if peace and truth be in my
days?” (II Kings 20:19).
He was not thinking of others but of himself. His
self-centeredness blinded him to sufferings that awaited the people he would
leave behind.
King
Uzziah
King Uzzah was one young man who began life on a
beautiful plane because he leaned on God’s Word through Prophet Azariah. As
long as he paid heed to God’s directives, he prospered and did well. However, when
he allowed self-importance to take center-stage of his life, he began to falter:
he took laws into his hands, despised others and finally destroyed a beautiful life
God had in store for him. II Chronicles 26:16 gave this sad commentary on the
life and times of King Uzziah:
“But when he was strong, his heart was lifted up to his destruction:
for he transgressed against the LORD his God, and went into the temple of the LORD
to burn incense upon the altar of incense.”
When self is on the driver’s seat, catastrophe
results. We can actually destroy ourselves by ourselves or save ourselves by
ourselves.
Prodigal Son
Driven by thoughts that centered only on himself, this
young man went to his father and in seven words, “…give me my share of the
inheritance….” communicated to
his father his desire to live life the way he wanted it. Filled with thoughts
of self, he took his own share of his inheritance and nearly destroyed himself.
We can become spiritual prodigals who live for
ourselves when we allow self to dominate our relationships with God and others.
Judas Iscariot
To say that Judas Iscariot was one of the rarest
privileged men to associate with Jesus is to say the least. He threw that
privilege to the garbage bin when he allowed self-interest to destroy a
beautiful career ahead. His self-centeredness was revealed when he went to
enemies of our Master to say to them, “…what will ye give me…? (Matthew
26:15).
Note:
One of the
most outstanding languages of self-centered people is Me. Amongst these characters x-rayed, you would notice the refrain,
Me. Self. I. These characters and
their ilk are not the only culprits. We are all involved.
THE POSITIVES
In Scripture, several characters also displayed that
they were not controlled by Me, Myself and I mentalities at various points in
their lives. Amongst these were:
Abraham
Being a man of considerable spiritual maturity and one
who was altruistic, faced with one of the most destructive challenges any
person could face – resource control,
Abraham demonstrated that self was not the epicenter of his earthly existence.
In a situation that would have pitched him and Lot at daggers-drawn, Abraham
said,
…Let there be no strife, I pray thee,
between me and thee, and between my herdmen and thy herdmen; for we be
brethren. Is not the whole land before thee? separate thyself, I pray thee,
from me: if thou wilt take the left
hand, then I will go to the right; or if thou depart to the right hand, then I
will go to the left - Genesis 13:8-9.
John the Baptizer
John the Baptizer demonstrated uncommon leadership
spirit and sportsmanship when his followers reminded him that the man (referring
to Jesus) he had baptized earlier had taken the shine off him and that he was
recording an avalanche of followers, John refused to yield to the demeaning
spirit of self-exultation. Rather than being bitter, he fought the urge to
politicize the work of God. He said to his followers:
…“A man can receive nothing, except it
be given him from heaven. Ye yourselves bear me witness that I said, ‘I am not
the Christ, but that I am sent before him.’ He that hath the bride is the
bridegroom: but the friend of the bridegroom, which standeth and heareth him,
rejoiceth greatly because of the bridegroom's voice: this my joy therefore is
fulfilled. He must increase, but I must
decrease” - John 3:27-30.
Apostolic
Injunction
Knowing
the evil effects that Me, Myself and I mentalities could have on people, especially
in Christian communities, Apostle Paul led by Holy Spirit enjoined Philippian
Christians as well as Christians everywhere to de-emphasize self and to
emphasize others and community attitudes:
If there be therefore any consolation in
Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any bowels
and mercies, Fulfill ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love,
being of one accord, of one mind. Let nothing be done through strife or
vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than
themselves. Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the
things of others - Philippians 2:1-4
The
Christian Magna Charter
In what could be described as Christian Magna Charter or Christian anthem (Motto), Christian life
is summed as one that self has taken the backseat while Jesus has taken the
drivers’ seats of individual Christian lives, Holy Spirit spoke through Apostle
Paul who penned:
I
am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I
live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me - Galatians
2:20.
BASIS OF THIS PRESENTATION
When we worship God in spirit and in
Truth, we naturally tend to forget about self
but when we stop worshipping God, we start worshipping self. When self is at
the center, God is relegated to the background and other people become an
afterthought. In this situation, God’s business becomes secondary while our individual
activities become primary.
Serving God requires absolute surrender. It is one
thing to be converted, but another thing to surrender. The greatest gift we can
give to the Lord is personal surrender. The gift of self is the greatest gift
(II Corinthians 8:1-5). God cannot move until we remove the things that inhibit
the move of God in our lives and in our congregations – the spirit of
self-importance.
WHAT IS SELF-IMPORTANCE?
Thomas Kevin observed that “Pride is nothing more than us highlighting
us.” The universe of self-importance
revolves around Me, Myself and I.
Roya R.
Rad observes that self-centeredness is an indication of self-importance and
wanting to be the center of attention. Self-centered people confuse
‘self-caring’ to being self-adulation.” Self-caring
means that you have concern for others, but not at the expense of yourself. It
is the ability to strike balance.
CHARACTERISTICS
OF SELF-IMPORATANT PEOPLE
Self-important people are
always on self-protection mode. There is a part of them that they do not like
and are trying hard to cover. They are always wearing invisible masks. They are
natural energy vampires. They can be arrogant. Some of the characteristics of
self-centered people are:
1. Arrogance and taking too many measures to protect
their self-images.
2.
Inward
insufficiency. They
may look ‘too confident’ on the surface but feel inadequate in their inside. They
are in search of ego feeders. That is why they use other people to fill up their
inner gaps.
3.
Intolerant
of differences. They
devalue others and put them at lesser positions. They lack abilities to feel
confident internally. They feel sense of superiority by seeing others as
inferior. They cannot accommodate different viewpoints. When you disagree with
them, they fall out with you.
4.
Unable
to have long lasting relationships. For them, people are either very
good or very bad, depending on
who admires them and who does not. In other words, if you fulfill their wishes,
you are good; if you do not, then you are bad. They can be your friend one minute
and an enemy the next.
5. Possess self-esteem holes. Self-esteem is how well-developed our
senses of self are. For self-important people, there are lots of holes in this
area that need to be filled.
6.
Maximize their importance but seek to
minimize that of others.
They run you down by telling how important they are, asking, “Do you know me?”
“Do you who I am?” “Do you know where I have been?” “Do you know the position
that I occupy?”...
SELF-LOVE: IS IT REALLY WRONG?
Self-love
is not completely wrong. Love for self is encouraged (Matthew 22:37-39). Self-love
is only wrong when one thinks of self more than he/she ought to (cf. Romans
12:3-4). If I truly love myself, I would have to ascribe to others the same
measure, not above or below. It must be the self-same affections (Matthew
7:12). Balanced
self-love is healthy. It gives people senses of worth, and value; it encourages
hardwork, discipline, focus and healthy competitive spirit. It helps people to
develop self -respect and deep senses of fulfillment and belonging.
CHRISTIANS
VERSUS ME, MYSELF AND I MENTALITY
Where spirit of self-importance envelopes an
individual, he/she becomes trouble waiting to happen (James 3:16).
Life is only
meaningful when we live lives of altruism, that is, putting others ahead of us
(Philippians 2:3-4). When we live for others, we reproduce the life of Christ
in us because He counted us as more important than Himself. Because He did,
today the world is all His, considering the fact that billions of souls have
given their lives to Him (II Corinthians 5:14-16).
One of the greatest battles we must
fight in life is battle against self-importance (II Chronicles 26:16). Until
you conquer yourself and subdue it to the point of where others become
important, their opinions counting and their interests as paramount as yours
are to you, you are dominated by Me,
Myself and I mentality.
Every new creature in Christ has died
to self, has become alive to God and to others.
In Christ, “I” is an old story. “I” no longer lives but Christ is the
one who is alive (Galatians 2:20). Christ
must increase but I must decrease
(John 3:30). To overcome, I must be “crucified.” This can only be realized when
I die daily (I Corinthians 15:31-32).
Our individual daily assignments would be to kill “I” and to ensure that “I” is
not as it used to be.
If a grain is planted but does not
die, it will not spring to life to bear more fruits (John 12:24). Death must
occur for our true personalities to emerge. So long as self remains on the
throne, our true spiritual personalities will remain unrealized.
When we de-emphasize self, we will
discover new senses of purpose, freedom and power. We will discover that life
is more pleasurable when lived for God and for others.
DYING THAT HE MIGHT LIVE (JOHN 3:30; GALATIANS
2: 20)
Throughout New Testament Scripture the principle of
self-crucifixion and Christ’s exaltation are quite pronounced (II Corinthians
5:14-15). Self is represented by the word, “I”. This word is rooted strongly in
the fallen nature of man. For the real nature of man to thrive, the fallen one
must consistently die and diminish. The fallen nature is the Adamic nature but
the real living nature is Christ nature. These two are present in each of us.
It behooves, therefore, that the one we desire to live must live while the
other dies. However, the Lord desires that we let self die (Matthew10:38-39) so
that Christ can live in us and through us.
Two great men of God in New Testament
realized that this is imperative and in their respective lives were determined
to let Adam die for Christ to live. To them, “Dying that He might live” was a
mandate:
§
John the Baptist
- “He must increase but I must decrease” (John
3: 30)
§
Apostle Paul - “It is no longer I who lives but Christ who
lives in me” (Galatians 2: 20).
Who is presently reigning in your life - you or Him?
If it is you, please let self die. But if it is Him, let there be an increase
of His nature in your life daily.
ME, MYSELF
AND I VERSUS GOD’S WORK
Self should
not the epicenter of earthly existence. Where self rules, God’s work is
relegated to the background. We will not be sensitive to the needs of God’s
work and will find it increasingly difficult to lend spiritual, morale and
financial supports.
We
must not be at ease in Zion (Amos 6:1). We must not be like those in Prophet
Haggai’s day who felt unconcerned over the well-being of God’s Work. They were
busy building their businesses and developing their careers so much so that
God’s House and work were left in states of ruin (Haggai 1:9). Life
teaches that only a few things are REALLY IMPORTANT – that is, labouring at the
foot of Jesus Christ (Luke 10:38-42). Eternity will not reward us for the
things we enjoyed but for the things we sacrificed for God, His Work and for
others.
SAVE MYSELF FROM MYSELF OR DESTROY MYSELF
BY MYSELF
We have been saved from our sins through faith in
Jesus and in His vicarious sacrifice on the Cross at Calvary. We also must
endeavour to save ourselves from ourselves – our pride, our worthiness,
temperaments, selfishness, and from our self-wills.
It is an established fact that man is his own best
friend and his own worst enemy. This was King Uzziah’s undoing. His self-worth destroyed
him. King Uzziah’s life provides lessons on how not to let self-importance
destroy us and others:
§ We must learn not to think highly of ourselves (Romans
12:3; II Chronicles 26:16).
§ No matter how well-placed we may be academically,
socially, economically and spiritually, we must never lose sight of the fact
that we are what we are by the grace of God (I Corinthians 15:10). Uzziah never
learned that lesson (II Chronicles 26:5, 15-16; cf. Ecclesiastes 9:11).
CONCLUSION There is no gainsaying that
God created us with senses of self-worth. This self-worth is what enables us to
live reasonably and responsibly. However, when self-worth degenerates into
negative self-importance of Me, Myself and I, it is then that we must step
aside to allow God’s Holy Spirit redirect our focus on who we really are and
what God expects each of to be.
We
must defeat negative self-importance by encouraging Community spirit,
de-emphasizing self but emphasizing Jesus and others. Biblical discipleship demands
self-denial and cross-bearing (Matthew 16:24-25).
God bless us in Jesus’ name!
HILARY
JOHNSON CHUKWUMA CHUKWURAH
Church
Of Christ, 14, Agbugwu Lane, Off,
University
Market Road, P. O. Box 351, Nsukka, Enugu
State
PHONE: 08039596919; 08182820677.
REFERENCES
Roya R. Rad ( 2010). “How To Deal With Self-Centered People.” Self Knowledge Base and Foundation, A
non-profit dedicated to public education. www.SelfKnowledgeBase.com
Tina Vasquez (2008). “Common
traits of the self-centered person: How to recognize and deal with self-centered people,”
Published
January 09.
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